Funny queries: What Google thinks of me

It’s been a long time since I used the metapost category. I’ve been taking a look at the queries received by Google for which this blogs shows up. Some of them are quite peculiar, some of them may give us an insight of what the search engine things of me. For example:

Query Impressions
grumpy old man 2,000
grumpy 400
grumpy man 400
ugly old man 250
grouchy old man 110
grumpy old 35
old grumpy man 70
grumpy gnome 12

There was a long list of variations to these phrases, but I didn’t want such a long post. Anyway, if you thought that grumpy is all Google considers me to be, brace yourself for a surprise:

Query Impressions
trained monkey 90
no life 90
funny troll
monkey using computer
tool monkey
congratulations monkey
monkey using tools

Basically, a computer using trained-troll monkey, with no life. Pretty accurate, some people may say.

Query Impressions
señal de muerte 12

Literally signal of death in Spanish. Tip: Lack of pulse.

Another common search:

hang yourself 200
how to hang yourself 90
rope to hang yourself 12

I guess those searches have a very low returning rate.

This is a query which sincerely surprised me:

Query Impressions
eliphant
eiephant
elehant
elepant
eephant
elephanth

I’ll do a public service here: it’s written ‘elephant’, buddy.

Advertisements


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s